July was the month when minute crocheted shorts for men – made from recycled blankets – finally hit the internet. In a way, this felt inevitable. It was only a matter of time, especially given the number of silly “trends” which have showing up on our screens and, most unsettlingly, our streets.
To help you put the horror of teeny tiny, multi-coloured man shorts into perspective, we've served them up alongside five of the most appalling men's fashion trends to hit the web – and the real world – in recent months. Brace yourselves...
1. Crocheted Hot Pants
Created by Etsy seller Schuyler Ellers (owner of the Lord von Schmitt store), these abominations are attracting substantial attention online from hipsters and horrified onlookers alike. Made from recycled Afghan blankets and stitched into these semblances of shorts, this is surely one of the worst “fashion” moments to ever happen online. According to their creator, however, these pieces of crocheted fashion are incredibly versatile:
“All I can say is crochet is universal, and anyone can rock a pair of these at any time. I wear them to sleep, and I also wear them to parties.”
2. Flower Beards
These blooming beauties hit the internet last summer and caused some sort of sensation. If you have a fine beard, why wouldn't you stick flowers in it, after all? Whether you love floral, facial freedom of expression or hate these furry, flowery monstrosities, there's no denying this look is flat out appalling.
3. Dyed Beards
It seems like hipsters can't get enough of faffing with their facial hair. For a (mercifully) brief moment, dyed beards were “a thing” and the results were – you guessed it – a whole rainbow of appalling.
Not OK now. Not OK two years ago. Never ever OK. Meggings arrived and, as proof that humanity has some semblance of sense, never really took off. Despite their failure to launch, meggings have left a visual scar, branded into the minds of all unfortunate enough to witness them in “action”. Appalling.
5. Hipster Mullets
These crimes against wholesome good taste have, thankfully, stayed in their subculture and not made it out into the wider population, for which we are all eternally grateful. After the 80s died, humanity as a whole evolved an instant nauseous reflex when confronted by a mullet. Sadly, much of hipsterism revolves around the philosophy that “I'm so cool, I can make the most repugnant look work”. And thus, the hipster mullet was born. Run away, appalled.
Which recent trend do you think is the most horrific? Share your “worsts” with other readers on the Base London Facebook page.